Shedding tears

From Sandy - Ron was so fearful when he left Reche Canyon and was taken back to Kaiser Hospital. However, once he got to the hospital, he seemed like a changed man. He wanted to read the newspaper, he was watching a basketball game on t..v. and he wanted to eat. Again, another high on the roller coaster called "Ron's Illness". However (and you should know this was coming) the past three days have not gone very well. He was being weaned once again off of the ventilator and was doing well the first and second day - the past three days he has not been able to breathe without his heart rate going up and taking way too many breaths per minute. He has been put back on full control by the ventilator. He is majorly depressed and cries every time I have gone to see him. If he isn't crying, he's upset with me because I tell him to "hang tough" - I have used many ways of expressing this, but virtually I am telling him to be strong and fight for recovery. It has broken my heart to see him cry. I don't know what to do for him and I feel absolutely helpless at these times. I want to make it better for him and I can't. I would bring him home in a minute if I knew that would work. But, he has way too many issues right now to be brought home. I can't believe this has happened to us. I can't believe that Ron's heart attack set him back so far. It all hurts and is so painful for me to see. I know Ron is despairing when he has these setbacks. All I can do is pray and pray and pray. I pray unceasingly for the Lord to help Ron in whatever way He sees fit. Yesterday and today I cried with Ron. Life is painful right now and the light at the end of the tunnel is very far away. I prayed with Ron today and asked the Lord to comfort Ron and grant him His peace that passes all understanding. Prayer can do wonderful things - I will not give up. I am only human and cannot see the future or know what it holds. But the Lord is in the past, present and future. He will be with us out there in the future I know this with all my heart and soul. This too shall pass. I have to ask the Lord to strengthen me because Ron's tears are tearing me apart. I want so much to make it better for Ron. Again, I will pray and pray and pray.