Trusting always in the Lord

From Sandy -

Ron is still in pretty bad condition. His kidneys are not doing well and he has fluid around his lungs. He still has diarrhea and the hospital is keeping him pretty much on morphine for pain. I can't believe everything that has happened to Ron in 11 months. I cannot tell you how much it breaks my heart that he was only home for one week out of these 11 months. He was so thrilled to be home. He was happy and content even though he was weak. Why the Lord allowed him to get so sick after all the months Ron tried to get better is way too much for me to figure out.

I am so depressed over the events that have occurred since the first of October. Ron has progressively gone down hill and has not really made any steps forward. I love my husband so much. I have been married to him for 44 years this December. I can't imagine life without him. We have definitely had our ups and downs, but through everything I have always loved Ron. I honestly don't know if he has ever accepted Jesus as his savior. I sure hope so. I have prayed for that in my most recent prayers. Jesus loves Ron and is just waiting for Ron to accept Him. When Ron leaves this earth, I so want him to know the love and peace waiting for him. I want him to be able to have a healthy youthful body that is not broken and hurting. I want him to be able to smile and laugh instead of grimace and frown with pain. It absolutely devastates to know what Ron is going through right now. I feel so helpless and have come to the point that I don't know what to pray. At this time in my life, I truly have to trust the Lord and know without a doubt that the Lord will do what is best for Ron. It may not be what I desire for Ron, but the Lord knows and I trust Him and only Him. Again, I refer to Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thy own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy path. This verse goes with me every hour of every day. When I get scared and feel lost - this verse gets me through. No - I don't understand why Ron has had to suffer so - but the Lord tells me to trust Him and lean not unto my own understanding. At times I don't know what to do - at these times I need to acknowledge the Lord and He will direct my path.

Anyone who cares to - please pray that Ron knows Jesus as his Lord and Savior. Ron has lived hell down here on earth - when he leaves this earth I hope and pray He will wake up in heaven.