My life

From Sandy -

It's been almost six weeks since my surgery and life has gotten almost back to normal. I can do everything I did before except I have to take alot of rest periods and find that I need lots of sleep. I have an appointment to see the surgeon on November 1, so I'll see if he schedules my second surgery at that time. I feel so truly blessed to have made so much progress since my surgery. I know that everyone's prayers (including mine) were answered and the Lord has been very good to me.

I'm not exactly looking forward to another surgery. However, it will mean an end to the colostomy bag hanging off the side of my abdomen. That will be such a relief to get rid of it. Once I found a bag that fit right - there have been no more leaks. But it sometimes gets very uncomfortable to wear and the skin around it is red and irritated. Every once in a while I think about the bag and feel like less than a person - but thank God the feeling comes and goes quickly. I have been blessed throughout this whole experience and I have to count the blessings and not think about the inconveniences that I have to live with right now.

I am so glad that I had the surgery. I don't have to worry about all those polyps and whether two, or three or more would turn into cancer. Again, God blessed me by directing me with baby steps to make the decision to have the surgery. It's amazing (not to God but to me) that he knew not to confront me with it all at once. Over the weeks that I knew I had to have surgery, I didn't know it would mean taking my entire colon. A genetecist at Kaiser was the one to bring it up and I thought she was totally wrong. Then my daughter told me it might have to be done. My doctor and the surgeon also told me I would have to have the colon removed. I finally had enough days and weeks to ponder the whole situation - and time was what I truly needed to accept it. Once I accepted the fact that I would need this major surgery, I sought prayers from my church, my friends, and my family. I prayed night and day and read the bible throughout each fear-ridden day. The verses I found were so soothing to me and all of them told me not to be afraid. Finally came serenity, trust in the Lord, and peace of mind about three or four weeks before the surgery. I knew I had to have it done and that the Lord would be with me throughout the whole process. He truly has been with me and I am so grateful that I knew the Lord before , but now I adore him with all my heart and soul. I still screw up once in a while, but thank God, Jesus took care of that by paying the price with His life. I know I am forgiven - certainly not perfect and yet God still loves me. What a miracle that is!!