From Sandy -
Ron took another trip to the hospital on Wednesday of this week (July 20). He went to the ER because he was having difficulty breathing and he was throwing up. I was just getting hopeful again when this new incident occurred. I met him at the ER of Kaiser Hospital and he was hallucinating and delirious. He did not know where he was and at times thought he was in Las Vegas or San Diego or Boston or in a strip mall. I sat by his side from 10:00 a.m. until 6:00 p.m. in ER. He kept trying to get out of bed and he was totally "out of it". It's pretty scary to see your loved one confused and hallucinating. I still don't know what caused it (probably one more infection, and he has had many), but he is better today. He had an appointment at Riverside Kaiser for a Swallowing X-ray the same day and was able to keep the appointment. He basically "flunked" the exam. He cannot swallow liquid without the danger of aspirating it. Threfore, he can't eat anything and will have to be fed through a G-tube in his nose. This is very discouraging and once he was "lucid" it was also very discouraging for Ron. I keep thinking things are getting better and then they take a turn for the worse.
Still I have hope and faith and tomorrow morning. Tomorrow morning may be down the road, but I know it is out there for us. Faith needs only one answer to a thousand "hows" - that answer is God. His abiding truth does not change with my mood and he never wavers when I stumble and fall over a promise of His through my unbelief. Although it's hard to imagine during the trials and storms of life - waiting under the clouds of trials is important because they will ultimately produce showers of blessings. I simply pray for God to grant me faith to completely trust His Word, even when every other sign points the other way. I many times say to the Lord "I do believe, please help my unbelief".
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