Wow - the trials

The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." Zephaniah 3:17, NIV

I have been preoccupied with being sicker than a dog. I fell and got cellulitis in my knee - and after the doctors put me on five different medications, I got gastritis. I was throwing up and having major heartburn as well as a tongue with tastebuds that were screwed up. I had dry mouth and the most horrible taste in my mouth - I can't even describe it. I became weak and light headed and simply felt rotten.

Fortunately, today I do feel better. I was taken off of the antibiotics and put on Prilosec which seems to have calmed my stomach. Who knew that antibiotics could cause so many complications?

While I was sick (which was for about two weeks) I have gone through another awakening in my life. I have been completely alone (except for my dogs) and have had to face fears by myself. I have never stopped trusting the Lord, although many times these past few days I asked him why. I have been through these trials with Ron's illness and then I have to face my own. I have never doubted the Lord or His word. But I have wondered what He is doing to me. However, I knew that the Lord was with me and would heal me.

The minute I started feeling better, I was praising and thanking the Lord. I know that He realizes what a weak person He is dealing with and He knows everything about me. He has never left me during these trials and tribulations and He has never ever stopped loving me. I have screamed at Him to help me and I know all I had to do was whisper because He is with me and will not fail me. I have to learn to not be dismayed or afraid. God will take care of me. He will see me through the hard times and bring me to the light of day. The Lord is mighty to save and has saved me over and over again. He calms my fears and wraps me in His arms. He is truly my shelter from all the fears I have faced and am facing. I am eternally greatful for His unconditional love and care!

Ron is in Pomona Rehab. Center. He is doing well over there but he hates it. He wants to come home and I know he gets mad at me that he can't come home. I keep telling him he has to get better and he will if he thinks positive and tries hard. He is going to work with rehab. today on his arms and legs. He is off of the ventilator and receiving oxygen through a trach. He has lots of secretions, so they cannot take him off of the trach. This is my way of life right now - overseeing Ron's care and seeing him every day. It has become the new "norm". Ron had his heart attack December 23, 2011 and has been home for one week - the week of October 7. In and out of the hospital and back to rehab has been a constant process. I keep praying for Ron and